Do Jocks Rule the World?

Is it just me, or do jocks rule the world?

In case you think I put the above sentence so delicately to belie my hatred for sports, let’s be honest – I am not a sports fan. I don’t hate it, I just didn’t possess any intrinsic predilection for competitive sports except for a daily routine to basically keep myself fit and healthy. But didn’t you realize these sweat-drenched sodden boys (and girls) whose core competency being merely celerity, endurance, and perhaps flexibility, are somehow culturally a notch above the non-jocks?

Lax and the City (Part 2)

Continue from Lax and the City (Part 1).

Lax and the City (Part 1)

A Broadway and “urban”-inspired depiction of my ambivalence – the celebration of city life and the frustration at the blatant laxity displayed by those who had the power and authority to define my city experience.

It is Driving me Crazy

I can be seen on the road occasionally. While I am no expert driver like what’s-his-name, I must say *ahem* I am a pretty good driver. I have NEVER honk. I have never hit someone else’s car in the rear or leave a scratch mark on someone else’s car at 1U parking lot like what some of my friends did. I always have my signals on when I turn. Heck, I did not even bribe my way to obtain my license.

Obliged Affection and its Discontent

You might consider doing one of the followings:

1. Stone me by putting a curse on me
2. Call me “bastard” or a**-hole, or its permutations
3. Recite Aesop’s fables and mystical tales about princes and princesses to remind me about the consequences that eventually befell the ungrateful child
4. Remind me of the ones who gave me life
5. Convince my mum to leave me by the gas station, like what Bree Van de Kamp did to Andrew (if you watch Desperate Housewives)

But screw obliged affection – my maternal grandfather is a jerk.
[With rumblings of distant thunder in the background, coupled with flashes of lightning.]

Now, who can make a difference?

Today my rolling eyes were stopped abruptly, like a car before a traffic light that suddenly turns red, by an article that appeared on The Sun “High Accident Rate a Headache: Tee Keat”. The new Transport Minister Ong Tee Keat suggested that the problem of road accidents is a headache for him. And he advised Malaysians to change their attitude.

The Color-changing Chameleon and My Deep-Seated Contention

Chameleon is one of the many things that you just find it hard to describe to others. What’s a chameleon, someone ask you. And you just can’t put on a description on its color like you normally would when describing an object. Because you don’t know what its true colors are, as it desperately tries to fight for its survival and protect itself from enemies. Surrounded by the greens of the leaves, it turns green. And no prizes for guessing correctly its color when it clings to the tree trunk.

The Exuberance of Working with Non-Profits

In my first foray into the local NGO scene, I was lucky enough to have found the serendipity and blessed enough to have discover the beginner’s luck.

To put it simply, it has been a rewarding and fulfilling experience that possibly made the NGO experience highly addictive to me, for the rest of my life.

It is of great pleasure to be able to work with Y4C. Y4C, short for Youth for Change, is a newcomer in the Malaysian NGO scene, yet the quality of the programs organized has never been a reflection of their inexperience. In just one year, they managed to build up remarkable connections with other NGOs in Malaysia, gathered a massive volunteer base, and most importantly, organized activities that have never been done before by other NGOs. The latter played a pivotal role in getting me to sign up as a volunteer.

During the recent by-election in some places in other states, they organized trips to the locations of the election. They ran into trouble with a political party affiliated with the ruling party, who thought they were some opposition groups and subsequently stalked them to monitor their every actions. It takes lots of audacity to be at that position, I reckoned, but they managed to stay together and get back safely. This is exactly what makes civil society movement so exciting – the defiance that you get to display, together with like-minded people around the country.

I did not have the time to go on the trip, plus I was rather afraid of things back then. But that incident inspires me a lot. A friend of mine claimed that the trip was indeed an “eye-opening” experience, opening her eyes to the true state of “democracy” of the country.

The first project that I worked on is the Young Voter’s Campaign. It was organized based on the premise that more than 4.9 million Malaysians above the age of 21 are not registered as a voter in the country, most of whom are young people congregated around urban areas like the Klang Valley.

I knew I wanted to do this. The alarming figure will consequently bring another dimension to electoral unfairness. That is, the true voices might not be reflected in the electoral results in this so-called democratic country.

Malaysians generally have a lot to complain. Traffic jams, rotten education system, racial discrimination, social inequality, poor public transportation system, corruption, lack of transparency, poor public delivery service, and of course denial of basic/fundamental human rights allocated under the Federal Constitution. The problem? These people however, never show their resentment through the cross on their ballot paper, or at least do not see the need to do so due to the general perception that the ruling party will always win ( through various means of course, like the control on media and the election commission, the mobilization of government’s machinery, huge campaigning budget (read: tax payer’s money), and of course, a never ending list of ( ) promises [never mind the EMPTY bracket].)

The next thing I know is, I wrote a little write-up about myself, and was called to their meeting subsequently.

I was overwhelmed with the familiar nervous disposition I used to have when I first joined the team because of the same ol‘ reason: I was afraid of what it could mean if I voice my opinions and give my ideas. I really do.

I was a little perturbed by virtue of my (not very young, but relatively young) age and my lack of experience. Being the youngest person to participate in this activity, the worse things that could happen is when people dismiss you as being young and think you should be hanging out at Friendster or My Space or playing (insert name of latest computer games) instead of doing this.

Nevertheless and thankfully, things turn out to be totally different and I instead get the nicest people that I’ve ever met to take me really seriously, who clearly displayed and conveyed through their every actions and behaviors, that every idea is equally important, regardless of your age and experience.

That itself made me stay on. It is also great for me to see people who are so passionate about civil society movement, coming together and making sacrifices and commitment to champion the cause that they really felt strongly for. What I see is the purest and most genuine form of passion and motivation, because money is completely out of the picture (since it is plain volunteering). While I am glad to meet such people, I am even more excited to know that there are so many passionate people in the country championing for various noble causes – perhaps a spark of hope for a better country in future?

I too am intrigued that meetings are really, really productive. And by saying that, I am saying there are sheer effectiveness in the conduct of these meetings, where there will surely be results or some form of finalization, unlike in situation where there could possibly be no outcome after a few hours of being in the boardroom in the corporate world.

It also occur to me that the NGO movement in Malaysia is like an interconnected huge “underground” web where everyone is so united, so together and seem to know each other. Throughout my involvement with Y4C, I met people from Bar Council, film director, columnist, people from CIJ, AWAM, Suaram and other NGOs, as well as some political figures, something that I wouldn’t imagine would happen to me few months before. Thanks to Y4C.

Meeting new people has always been my passion, especially meeting like-minded and more matured people. I benefited a lot through my meeting with other volunteers. Jien Sing, for example gave me a lot of info about American universities. He went to University of California Berkeley, one of the elite schools in US and the world. These information are extremely crucial for me to know since I will be applying to US schools end of this year. Joyce Tagal, the expert in US application is also someone I am utterly thrilled to meet. I’ve read her blog for a very long time but have never met her or seen her. Not forgetting wonderful people who made my life more enriching. People like Lai Ming, Su-Ann, Roseline, Regina, Patrick, and other wonderful people are really fun to have as a friend. I have also finally spoken to Tony Pua. I previously have seen him and had emailed him but never spoke to him in person before. Not forgetting people like Khai Loon and Yee Ling who’d gave me many learning opportunities and taught me many things.

My most critical contribution to the team and ultimately to the cause, albeit it was rather insignificant, is doing copywriting work in the project. Rudimentarily, my responsibility is to write a leaflet to educate the public about voting right.

The challenge? To make things comprehensible for the general public.

The leaflet team met up during weekends, write lots of drafts, discussed, send emails, show friends to proof read, etc, etc. The leaflet is there to inform the public about their rights, and more importantly, what should they be taking into consideration when putting that crucial cross on that ballot.

Of course, we can’t say things like, “Article XX of the federal constitution states that every citizen must vote….”. That itself is a total turn off. I did read the constitution, and mind you, it is an agonizing process. Reading the Malaysian constitution is the last thing in mind for the general public. Upon much deliberation, we’ve come up with 7 different issues that we believe the public should take into account when making the political decision. They are: freedom of press, freedom of association, embracing diversity, separation of power, government transparency, competent governance, and most importantly, fair election.

Bearing in mind that we can’t write things like “Freedom of press is allocated under Article 10 of the Constitution of Malaysia. In Reporters Without Borders’ annual Press Freedom index, Malaysia ranked…..”, and that nobody wants to read something that sounds like a legal statement, convoluted with jargon and terms that aren’t that accessible to the general public, we finally reached a note of concordance to firstly tell people what are their rights with respect to each of the 7 issues outlined in a fairly simple way.

For “Freedom of Press” for instance, we said, “A free press is like your eyes and mouth……You are intelligent enough to judge for yourself… You don’t need someone else to censor …..” Basically, we used highly anecdotal and relevant context in order to convey our thoughts effectively.

After knowing their fundamental rights and what they are entitled to, we then tell them the consequences of voting blindly without caring for the particular issue. Lastly, we illustrate the benefit that the people will get if they care and are concerned.

Just some example, for the “Competent Governance” part, we have this:

————————————

Competent governance
A competent government strives for progress and an open and just society. A competent government is also efficient and able to please the people. And you are entitled to that.

If you don’t care…

• You might need to wait for a long time to get your passport done – you might miss your flight!
• You will not be able to speak up even when you feel you need to – that is like taping your mouth with tapes.
• You might be discriminated through government policies because you are of Race X or Gender Y or Sexuality Z

If you care…

· Everything is done efficiently. This improves the competitiveness of Malaysians. – And you don’t have to miss your flight

· You can tell the government what you think and provide them constructive feedback to improve – they will take your interests into account to provide you with what you want (that’s reliable public transport, fair education system, livable environment etc)

· Everyone is treated equally, it is a fair and just society

————————————

One of my biggest personal accomplishments is to overcome my personal fear – the fear of going out to the street and talk to people/distribute stuffs in outreaching activities. The notion of outreach programs in this campaign left me in uttershock. Questions started popping out. I was really not receptive to the idea of talking to random people on the street.

People would probably think I have lost my sanity. The worst thing is of course, being treated rudely by some people. I guess I was too into my youthful idealism that Malaysians are friendly (which is not really the case) and so naively believed that everyone is as nice as how I treated people. Sigh, what has befallen mankind…

Far from my sluggish beginning, I am now proud to say I have managed to overcome that street phobia. I have learned to stay true to myself and be indifferent to what others might think about me. I have come to learn to take pride in whatever I do. Whether or not people think I am being jerk for talking to people whom I do not know is totally another issue.

There are situations where I was ignored completely, and there are situations where I was thought to be some bogeyman or salesperson. A friend of mine, who also volunteered, said something very enlightening. He advised everyone that we (volunteers) should not bear reservations on the fear of altering our own “friendly Malaysians perception”, but instead should open up our eyes to see the real world.

That itself is insightful, and perhaps is the reason behind my determination on doing this till the end of it, apart from opening my eyes to see for myself the true reality of the Malaysian way of life. Of course, some people are kind enough to listen to you. Some offered to help! Some gives constructive feedback, some teases their friends for not voting! Anyhow, as I am writing this now (two months after the outreach activities), I reckoned it was not a bad thing either. It actually indicates the diversity of the human race, the various behaviors and attitudes of people. That diversity shapes the world like it is today, add sugar and spices to our everyday lives.

Throughout my volunteering period, I had on several times went on to the activities without informing my dad about it. Uh-oh. (Insert horror theme from X-files with the sound of lightning strike)

Yes, I know, that is not a very good son of me (for not telling him about it). If I did, he probably (like he did before) exaggerate and tell me things like getting arrested, as if all people who work with NGOs will be arrested. This undermines my ability to make informed judgment of what is happening in the “real” world. I felt offended. This is also the reason why people are reluctant to join NGOs – the fear of getting arrested following the introduction of oppressive laws introduced by the government.

I am clearly aware of how people get arrested and how the ISA and other “draconian” laws work. Event like the Young Voter’s Campaign is neutral, non-bias, and has educational purposes (in fact, taking over the educational role from the authorities who seemed to prefer people to not vote in general election). I personally do not foresee any trouble with the authorities by involving with it.

Moving forward, I do not think I will stop doing what I did, even though it did not augur well with my dad. After all, my life is all about myself. I am in charge of making decision for myself, not he making decision for me. Furthermore, the cause that I champion for is too great for me to rest in the laurels and merely hope things will happen itself in the country.

What’s next?

Be on a constant lookout for opportunities to champion for greater cause and issues that I felt strongly for.

In Defense of the Academically Marginalized

Just yesterday there is this education issue that comes to my mind, sparked by a conversation between my mum and dad at the dining table. My dad (he is a professor at Universiti Malaya) went for an invigilation earlier as an assignment given by his superior to observe how students are being taught in the “last” few classes, “last” being those classes which consists of students who are considered academically inferior in the system.

When he came home, all he bragged about was how terrible the students were, going in and out of the classroom without the teacher’s permission, and how the teacher did not even bother to rectify things and control the situation.

As my dad continues to make fun of these students, my mum, who is a teacher (part of the system), joined him later, as if they were talking about the clowns in a circus.

I didn’t feel good; I was convulsed with that oh-so-familiar rage. Pushing the rewind button, I recalled that I was once an “atrocious” student in the system; I was a deliberate-rebel of the system. I remembered how disappointed I was not being able to take part in a Physics rocket making project just because I did not manifest great grades. I know how it felt like having the desire to move forward and not being able to do so. I simply know how it feels to be considered academically inferior.

I know why we can’t function well, and continue to not function well. We are being segregated.

The educators are doing a fine job, only to those considered “smart”. “Smart” students and “good classes” receive the most attention in school, receive most resources in schools, and have more privilege to participate in all forms of activities to improve themselves. On the other hand those in the “weak classes” are being segregated, and lessons are being taught without any effort to generate improvements from these students. Some “educators” like my parents even make a fool out of them.

To paraphrase the famous adage of “the rich get richer and the poor become poorer”, in the Malaysian education system, the “good” students are better off whilst the “not-so-good” students become worse.

The point I am trying to put forward is that in most education-related publication, there is little effort to bring out the voices from the most important component of an education system – the students. More so from students considered to be academically inferior. It was as if they were such a disgrace to the system that they deserve to be completely isolated from it.

Doctorjob, for instance features articles on course selections, career choices, etc. These might be relevant to those academically superior, but the “other group” has absolutely no reason to read these items. And it is not because they do not care about their future, but because they are not being exposed to a true and complete academic process, which subsequently keeps their passion and true interest hidden and undiscovered. Some internal education fairs in my previous schools are only available to an exclusive group of people (read: those who presumably will go on to higher education and those who are perceived to have sustained interest in studying)

The Star Education, arguably the education publication of the country, meanwhile, focuses more on what the decision makers have to say, as well as some campus insights and school happenings, and never really dissects what really happen in government schools. Perhaps there are a couple or two special reports on these segregated students once in a blue moon, but as far as I am concerned, this group of people is the one that will contribute to the unemployment figures annually, the very group that deserves more attention from the media.

A Confession of an Undeserving Valedictorian

Confess, I must.

“I was an atrocious student.”

Hmm… Let’s see if the above statement of mine is justifiable. Ranked 28th in 5 AMANAH in the year 2006 (and probably ranked more than the 30th in whole of form 5); Marks for Physics and Chemistry constantly hovering around 50% to 60% despite my father being a (ironically) Chemistry professor; skipping lessons for approximately 1 month and not entering the class at all during the Star NIE competition; preparing for Malaysian Philharmonic Youth Orchestra audition almost 5 hours a day in the midst of internal school examinations; and, if these were not compelling enough to reaffirm the above statement, how about failing my very first Additional Mathematics examination?

If you do not wish to hear from someone like this, don’t read on. I will certainly not write what everyone wishes to hear from a “good student”, because that’s just not me. Instead, I will write something that is really from the real me.

Being conferred the award “Best All-rounder” for class 2006 (which is essentially Valedictorian Class 2006), I can’t help feeling undeserving, primarily because I was not fit to be one.

Academically, I did not excel as well as a class valedictorian should be scoring.

Nonetheless, I wasn’t that atrocious when I first came. I was a remarkable student, and was pretty sure I deserved to be on Dean’s list.

Push the “Rewind button”.

I enrolled in high school, consistently staying on top of the class rank, and had 8As to my credit in the PMR examination. It was during the transition from Form 3 to Form 4, that something happened.

I made a significant decision to embrace a paradigm shift. I decided that good grades were not what I wanted.

But why? Everybody wants good grades, right? And there I was, having the results what most people could only dreamed of, and decided that it is not the most important thing in life anymore.

I had good grades, but hey, I lacked in many areas. I was a laggard in extra co-curricular activities. I did not have great intellectual abilities, I could not analyze things, be critical about important issues, be creative or innovative. I could not be assertive or speak with conviction. I lacked leadership skills, unable to make important decisions. I lacked organization skills, I can’t speak well, I can’t…

I can only conform, that was what I do best. That was the effect of the Malaysian education system on me, and on some of the students too, I hope. The thing is, I barely (read: never) learned anything during my lower secondary academic life despite having good grades. I know how stuff works, but I do not understand how stuff works! I memorized stuffs for the sake of exam, and when I tried to apply the knowledge that I’ve learn to other applications, I simply couldn’t do so. I had experienced a total distortion of the true meaning of learning. I can only admire great inventors from far, who essentially are those who fully utilize their knowledge and understanding to produce great things.

I simply am unfulfilled.

I decided to change, change for the better. I wanted to live a fulfilling academic stint. I wanted to learn in the true way, and bring meaning back to education. Not to mention I wanted to engage in some personal development too, developing myself into someone with vision, firm beliefs, goals, and principles. All these fuelled my desire to engage in stuffs that I like to do. That was a moment of prodigious tentativeness. I did not know what was in store for me in the future as the direct implication of my decision. It was just, the beginning.

I tried my hands on clubs, societies, and competition. It was a sluggish start. Everyone was so outspoken, creative, always ahead; and that intimidated me a lot. Many a time, I dreaded attending the meetings. When I attended meetings, I hardly speak. I was too afraid to do so, not that I did not try. My suggestions were often treated with derision, and that hurt me a lot. I guessed stuffs that I said weren’t very constructive then.

My academic results began to deteriorate. The agony of being excluded from the top-student league where students compared their exam results to develop a preview of who’s first in class and so on, was unbearable. My friends were concerned that I was ruining my very own life. My parents were disappointed, utterly, for their child has turned into a monstrous person who wasn’t diligent anymore.

But still, I persevered. I do not know if all these could change my life, but I do want to take the risk to believe in myself and trust my intuition, that this journey will eventually bear fruits. Belief was all I had.

I summoned my courage to try things out. I trained myself to speak, to search for ideas, to develop creativity, to cultivate eloquence and excellent communication skills. I started reading extensively about Neuro Linguistic Programming, personal development, creativity, innovation, leadership skills, management, and et cetera. I was amazed by my diligence in doing all these. Along the way, I developed an true understanding for the adage “Success is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration”. I fell many times, but adhere firmly to the belief that success does not come easy without hard work. I sometimes was skeptical of the rightness of my decision, but had somehow learned to trust myself and believe in what I believed in.

In the academic part, I learned in my own way, refused to succumb to what I believed was not the right way to learn. I tried to understand things, and think about it for a very long time, at the same time visualize how what I’ve learned can be applied to real-life. That, I reckoned took away most of my time.

Perhaps the reward for my perseverance and firm belief, I finally rose to the top in societies and clubs. I was the President of the Red Crescent Society, Travel Club, and the Editor-in-Chief of the Editorial Board in the year 2006. I went on to bring changes to the societies and club that I helmed. I knew heading several organizations was my golden opportunity to develop skills that are needed for me to venture into the outside world. It was also then that I realize that I will want to own my very own business someday. Most people began to rest on their laurels once they successfully climbed to the top, as if being the president of this and that is for a mere certificate or to make their resume looks better. I brought changes, and somehow wanted to leave a legacy or mark. I am extremely proud of the changes that I made in the Editorial Board 2006.

I went on to form the team Urban Sapiens to join the Star C4R competition, and won the national competition. The rest is history.

Today, I am the proud owner of confidence. I had many skills that many people only dreamed of (albeit there are still room for improvement.)

The main idea of this article is not to discourage others to abandon their studies. Nor I want to spread my own propaganda or my hidden agenda about the detestable Malaysian education system.

I simply want to say, believe in what you believe in, and never give up what you believe in or let others discourage you.

I believed in myself, and it was because of this, that I won a national competition, won the Best Overall Student Award, being able to articulate ideas and thoughts, discover my true passion, develop my goals, having big dreams and visions, being able to socialize, able to make decisions, having the never-give-up spirit, and most importantly, having firm beliefs and principles.

I now championed for education equality and quality education for all Malaysians, press freedom in the society, and keep myself abreast with the latest development in the country. I dreamed of playing in a big orchestra, owning my own business, et cetera. The skills that I’ve acquired have helped me greatly in my current doings and I believe will aid me a lot in my future endeavors too. Should I not persevere and hold tightly to my belief and defy all attempts to change my view on things, I will probably be known as the guy getting 14A1s and nothing else. I will have no direction in life and will probably answer “See results first la” when being asked about my future plans while waiting for SPM results.

Let me quote Mr. Yap, a high school teacher of mine. “Character is equally important,” referring to an important criterion in selecting the Valedictorian for class 2006. It was this kind of personality and, (I would like to say) defiance to whatever that obstructs my way forward that brought me this award, that gave me the extra edge over other equally, if not more qualified candidates. I am extremely happy that my defiance against all odds paid off and was well-recognized!

Perhaps I didn’t make a wrong choice.

Perhaps, I shouldn’t have confess at all!